The Proposal.
Three years. Simply. Uniquely. Amazing. The screen panned off these words before the big moment…...
Act II. Scene I. The Big Question before the Big Question.
That The Big Day might take place on November 3, 2004 was a thought in the back of my mind, oh, almost since we had started dating on November 3, 2000 (and I'm not sure it was too far from her mind, either). Of course I didn't let myself get too caught up in the thought of it since I am very much a believer in living in the moment and in following God's will - which may or may not have involved Heather and I by November 2004... there were a lot of things that needed to happen before I could plan such an event.
But alas, a year passed, then two, and on approaching three I still felt very much like God still had Heather and I together for a purpose. I prayed very much about the decision to ask Heather to take the relationship to the next level. With the go ahead from the Big Guy (so to speak), I knew that it was important to myself and Heather that I ask her dad for his parents' blessing on our marriage.
I also felt it was important to ask a group of Heather's closest friends the same question... her roommates - Amy, Christen, and Heidi. I asked them a few weekends before The Big Day, when Heather was out of town. I called over to make sure they were home, and asked if I could come over for a bit. Amy talked to me on the phone, and I think it was pretty obvious what was up...
I showed up at the door with four smoothies - of course to win the girls over. After a few minutes of me sitting there sorta awkwardly while we all sat around and talked like their was nothing up, I interrupted that I had a question. It was something like this: "so, I was wondering if it would be ok with you if I married your roommate?" at which point some tears welled up in the group, myself included. They all said yes and gave me a hug, and then they proceeded to drill me as to how it was going to happen. Being my usual secretive self, I told them very little, other than I would probably need their help, and they were all sworn to secrecy for the next few weeks.
The time to ask Heather's dad, Kim, came in the week before The Big Day. I think I would have been tremendously nervous, but the way things happened really helped me to be quite calm, actually. While Heather's family was down for Parent's Weekend at the end of October, I had arranged for some time alone with Kim when we went with brother-in-law Eric to his golf course in Rancho Mirage.
If we had actually made it to that moment, I can imagine I would have been pretty nervous. But, as luck would have it, we went out to dinner the night before. The guys (bro-in-law Chris, Kim, and I) rode home to Chris and Bronwyn's in one car, while the lady's went out for ice cream (I think that was it). When the guys got home, we sat down to watch basketball on TV. At one point Chris left the room for several minutes, at which time I realized I was all alone with Kim - a perfect time to jump the gun and ask. I wasn't nervous, because I hadn't even expected to ask at this moment... it was great! I asked, he gave us his blessing, we hugged, and it was all over in a couple minutes. The girls came home, none the wiser. I did mention it to Bronwyn secretly later that night, but Heather never knew.
The Set-Up
We decided to celebrate our anniversary on Sunday, November 2, 2003 instead of November 3, our real anniversary, due to classes and such. Before I go on, I just have to say how perfectly every bump in the road, every unplanned issue occurred. For example, the date being on Sunday allowed for the romance of asking her the big question at midnight. Or the fact that it rained the day before and the day after our date, but not on, just so the air was crisp and clean for us. There are more pieces to this theme, but that will come out in the story…
The Morning Of...
She (the beautiful one) woke up to a dozen single, whole, white roses leading from her bed in the bedroom out to the living room to a little arrangement, much like the year before. However, the differences were that there were all white candles, white tissue paper, two pictures from our previous anniversaries, and a card entitled "A Simple Request" (sooo foreshadowing - it was great!).
We left the arboretum after that, stopped by the mall on the way hope for a brief interlude to pick up a present for sister Laura and Heather had some dippin' dots for the first time. I dropped her off at her apartment, of course to 12 more single, whole, white roses to get ready for the evening, which I told her would involve a nice dinner.
The Big Night
Picked her up at about 6:30 to leave for dinner. She was gorgeous (always is, of course), wearing black pants with a little sash-belt-thing, and a strapless shirt-thing (forgive my fashion vocabulary). I wore my suit, white shirt, and Matt's (roommate Matt) red presidential Ross tie ($4!!). We then started driving... 210 East, 57 South, 5 South... she really had no idea where we were going - the Ritz Carlton in Laguna Niguel.
We got to the Ritz, valet parked (with Larry, of course), and went in to the restaurant. Brief description of the Ritz: this hotel is the only hotel in California to have ALWAYS had a five star rating. The Ritz has been compared to the Getty (art museum) - there is so much original artwork on the walls. The hotel is interspersed with grand (yet cozy) hallways with wood burning fires and piano players, outside courtyards with fountains, and coi fish ponds. All this, and the Ritz is on a 150 foot cliff over-looking the Pacific Ocean, with a lit winding path down to the water.
We finished dinner, had some hot chocolate, said our goodbyes to Dean, and walked around the hotel and grounds. We ended up going down the path to the beach, and sat down on a log piling. (NOTE: there were several anticlimaxes to the night, where I could have asked her, adding to the fun) Humorous interlude: this was where I got really nervous, because all of a sudden we noticed white rocks out on the beach below spelling something out... It started with a heart, and then "______, will you marry me"??? Not cool, not cool at all! I didn't write the _____ for mystery's sake, I wrote it because I couldn't make out the actual name - but it wasn't me! This added just a little stress since this was where I was going to give her the "big" gift of a whole cd ;-)... So anyways, I pulled a rose out (in her mind this was the last rose, hehe) and gave it to her. I then pulled out a CD with the words "The Big Day" on it (again foreshadowing) and gave it to her. I told her it had pictures and music on it and that I had spent a long time making it. Actually, the pictures and music and time parts were all right, but the CD was completely blank - just a decoy ;-). I also pulled out something I had written about her two years ago after our first anniversary and read it to her, which was of course very sentimental. I would include it, but it is too personal. I'll just say it was called One Sweet Day, and it was about the day we met.
After this, we talked for awhile and then got up, walked the path back to the hotel, and left. Humorous interlude: poor Larry, poooor Larry… the tourist website that I had read said that valet parking at the Ritz was $15, so be prepared - so I was, I brought a $20, because then I could pay for parking and give a tip in one fell swoop, right? Well, wrong. When I was getting in the car, I asked Larry how much I owed him, and he said the parking was complimentary, and something along the lines of tip him whatever I wanted. All this as he was closing my door, AAHHH!! So in my moment of indecision (I had a $20 and a $1) I couldn't think of what to do, the door was closed, and I drove away, feeling terrible for Larry. Sorry Larry!
The END, *wink* *wink*
So that was the end of the night, right? We drove back towards Azusa. Humorous interlude: on the way back, as per Heather's prodding, I took the right split of the 5 North, which turned out to be a trucks only route. It was kinda funny to be driving in the lane alone in a Volvo with Oregon license plates surrounding by huge trucks... When we got closer to Azusa on the 57 North, we "decided" (all part of the plan) to stop by Starbucks, which was conveniently closed (I had not planned to get there so late, but it was a good thing it was closed, because it would have messed up my timing and plans). However, we still stopped and I got out to "see if it was closed." When I got back in the car, magically I had another rose, which threw Heather off, because of course the last rose had come like it always did at the restaurant with the final "gift," right? I then said something along the lines of let's change the cd that had been looping love songs all night. When she went to the glove box to get the cd case out, she didn't find a cd case… but she did find another rose with an arrangement of white tissue and such and one of my ties. I then blindfolded her with the tie and we took a little drive...
I didn't want her to know that the drive was back to the APU campus, because how is that romantic at all? That, and it set the mood of intrigue and mystery, of course. We got to the APU campus at around 11:45pm (keep in mind that our real anniversary wasn't for 15 more minutes). I parked and walked her in, blindfolded, to Munson chapel. For those of you that don't know Munson chapel, it is the perfect setting - a 300-seat auditorium, fully acoustic modern structure, with a stage and a full lighting and sound system, and a pop down movie screen. When I took the blindfold off, the auditorium had very low, very romantic lighting, music, and the stage had candles all over it (way to go, roomies..). I led her to our seats, third row back, middle seats, where the 35th rose was on her seat. I gave it to her and we sat down. I took the remote and turn the projector on and magically a movie started playing - of the last three years of our lives together! This was where Heather started to cry, and also, according to her later, where she noticed my heart rate really speeding up (her head was on my chest).
When the movie was over, I stood up and said to her, "remember that dance you wanted to have alone earlier? Would you like to dance?" She said yes, so I took her by her hand up to the stage and we danced. At the end of the first slow dance, I looked her in the eyes and said something along the lines of: "You've probably noticed that I haven't said anything about numbers of roses this year. Well you've received 35 roses so far today. I didn't want to give you 36 though, because it wasn't actually our anniversary yet (2yrs, 364 days doesn't count!). BUT, now it is 12:01 AM, so it is our anniversary now, so there is a 36th rose." The rose was on the edge of the stage, stage left, with the same arrangement that she had woken up to that morning (the "A Simple Request" card and everything). I led her over to that part of the stage, and knelt down to pick up the rose, turned around on my knee with a rose and a little box, and said, "Heather, will you marry me?"
At which point Heather started bawling and nodding and I stood up and gave her a huge hug. After about 10 seconds she got out a yes! After about 45 she asked me if I had asked her parents, to which I let her know I took care of it. I then put the ring on her finger, and realized how much more beautiful that piece of jewelry looked on that finger than in any case.
We danced a few more slow songs and both cried a lot. We then walked slowly back to the car, and then returned to her apartment, where we sat in the car for a few minutes and talked. When we got into her actual apartment, magically her roommates, and my roommates, and Chris and Bronwyn were there! So aside from being able to come down from the excitement together for a short while, Heather didn't have to wait until the morning to share her joy with people. She called and talked to her mom and dad, we took some pictures and told the story and that was it... well, maybe not it, maybe that was just the beginning!
The Beginning.... on to the marriage.
